Red is confirmed

Yesterday Red got the results of his western blot test. As soon as he got the envelope with the results he texted and said he was feeling scared all of a sudden about opening the results. I texted back that I'd go meet him right away so we could open the envelope together.

For a second I was wondering why he got scared because I thought we were both at the acceptance stage already. But then I immediately realized that he was scared because a part of him was hoping that the confirmatory test turned out false positive. A part of him was still hoping that he didn't really have HIV, so I needed to be there for him because I don't ever want Red to feel alone when he's dealing with stuff like that.

I met him at the KFC near the hospital and he opened the envelope. He was confirmed for HIV 1 but not for HIV 2. I told him that from what I read (though I may be wrong) that it was a good thing because HIV 1 is the less active strain of the virus. He took the news OK. He admitted that yeah a part of him was hoping that the test turned out to be false positive, but that he was also at the acceptance stage and wanted to focus on getting the rest of the tests done.

We had previously discussed Red serving a 30-day notice period before moving back to Manila so he could get his CD4 and viral load tests done there, but now we aren't so sure if we should wait that long. I haven't even got my western blot results and I'm freaking out about how long everything is taking. I've read forums on poz.com and some people in Western countries get all their tests done within a few weeks and start meds if needed shortly after. Meanwhile in our city, each test takes weeks to process because the blood samples always have to get sent to Manila for analysis.

Today, Red and I will go meet his infectious diseases doctor. It will be my first meeting with a doctor since I found out that I had HIV. Hopefully I can move back to Manila soon so I can find a permanent doctor and so that I won't have to wait weeks and weeks for each test result to come back.